Change by Orange Modus Operandi

As the first days of the new year unfold some of our best plans and intentions for a fresh start may be already unraveling.

You’re not alone.

Old routines and habits slither in despite the best of intentions. Like you I have experienced set-backs and distractions in trying to make changes. I also have had success in making some positive shifts.

What did I do differently?

It has to do with my favourite colour orange.  (Sorry Jill!) I follow a process that I have coined the Orange Modus Operandi or OMO.

Here’s is a summary of the process:
O  Observe what’s going on
R  Record what you experience
A  Assess the patterns
N Note more than one goal
G  Gather information
E  Express your success

In the next few posts I’ll explain just how my personal OMO has helped me make some shifts in several areas of my life. Today I’ll start with the most challenging habit needed for change and that is to Observe.

observe

 

“We have forgotten how to observe.
Instead of observing we do things
according to patterns.”   Andrei Tarkovsky

 

Why is it so difficult to observe? Multitasking and busyness are valued and admirable traits that our peers and our leaders extol even though brain research does not support multitasking as an advantage. “For the brain to function optimally, it needs its full beam of attention on one activity at a time” (Ellen G. Goldman). However we have built a distraction economy that stimulates our egos with ‘hits’ ‘likes’ ‘feeds’ and ‘tweets’ causing us to self-evict from the regenerative practice of stillness and silence.

Screen Shot 2016-01-05 at 2.06.35 PM

The act of observation is unattractive.
Observation is not always quantifiable and does not produce immediate results but it is the first humble step in identifying patterns, behaviours, and influences.

Reclaiming the practice of observation may be disheartening or it may even feel oppressive. Despite the discomfort, I encourage you to press on.

The act of observation takes more courage than we realize.

So what happens when we practise observation?

We Think  We think about and reflect on what is going on around us and reconsider the obvious.

We Relate  We re-examine relationships in what we see.

We Recognize Patterns  We observe patterns in behaviours, feelings, responses, choices and interactions.

We Listen  We stop multitasking. We remain still and listen not only to what is going on around us and with people, but we listen with our gut – our instincts.

We Ask Questions
  We ask questions we think are important. We expect resistance from those who object to our questions and we wonder about the deeper issues that cause the disconnect when our questions are asked.


In the next post I’ll discuss the next step, Record. I’ll show you some tools that work for me in recording patterns, ideas and questions in order to achieve a desired change.

How about you?

What do you do to participate in observation?

What challenges do you face when you try to just observe?

I would be interested in your comments.

My Costco Stalker Was Wrong!

The GoldfinchThe Goldfinch by Donna Tartt
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I was in the book section of Costco when a stranger put this book in my hands and said, “This is the best book you will ever read.” I politely acknowledged her enthusiasm and put the book down. She followed me along the book display and repeated, “No really, this is a GREAT book.” Who stalks people in Costco because they are so excited about a book? I was curious. So I bought The Goldfinch.

170 pages in – I was captivated and slightly overwhelmed by the dismal experiences; nevertheless, the writing was exquisite.

771 pages done – I was extremely irritated by the author, the characters and the final resolution. I was left with one question, “Where the hell was the editor?” While reading the book the editor forgot to EDIT the parts that are not essential to the plot and development of the characters.

This book is like sitting down to a decadent dinner for two and being served a feast for 20. For those who like to gorge on words, this is your book. For those who appreciate the brilliance of brevity, by page 771 you will be jaded by the unlikelihood of Boris’ “faithful dog-like” character, very annoyed by the laboured monologue at the end – no longer in the voice of Theo and bewildered by the lack of influence of Theo’s true love – Pippa.

If I see my book stalker in Costco again I will say, “Spectacular writing – abominable editing.”

View all my reviews

Organizing Your Junk Drawer of Fears ~ Sweat The Small Stuff

In his book, An Astronaut’s Guide To Life, Chris Hadfield emphasizes the  importance of paying attention to the small things. His ideas resonated with me and these are some of my personal precepts I gleaned from his book.

Sweat the small stuff and slash your fear. Screen Shot 2015-05-26 at 8.16.16 AM
I think the root of most of our fears, especially those fretful reels of “what ifs” on rewind in our heads emerge from missing information.  Most “cerebral cinematics” keeping us awake at night are spliced together with snippets of limited information that we often perceive to be unpredictable and thus out of our control. Some of this information is easily accessible and it just takes a level of intention to search it out and create systems for easy retrieval.  Minimizing some of these apprehensions requires a discipline to search out the facts in order to form and hold a broad understanding of all possibilities.  The parameters of any given problem are often much more expansive after further inquiry and thus less frightening. Hadfield suggests that,

 “fear comes from not knowing what to expect and not feeling you have any control over what’s about to happen. When you feel helpless, you’re far more afraid than you would be if you knew the facts. An astronaut who doesn’t sweat the small stuff is a dead astronaut. Part of it is ‘how do you deal with fear?”

We all have fears. They jumble together with real and perceived threats in our personal junk drawer.junkdrawer

When my junk drawer can no longer be slammed shut I reluctantly take stock of what’s knocking around together and empty out knickknacks I no longer want. There may be answers and even insights if I resolve to organize my junk drawer of fears. Maybe I can repurpose this junk drawer by taking a little more time to scrutinize their diminutive purpose in my life.

Sweat the small stuff  and cultivate competence. Screen Shot 2015-05-26 at 1.55.21 PM

Competence is not dazzling – it’s discipline. Hadfield defines competence this way:

“Competence means keeping your head in a crisis, sticking with a task even when it seems hopeless, and improvising good solutions to tough problems when every second counts. It encompasses ingenuity, determination and being prepared for anything.” 

Competence requires courage. Courage to gaze beyond the clutches of our perceptions and consider our past and present choices.

Sweat the small stuff and experience wonderScreen Shot 2015-05-26 at 1.39.33 PM

“Life off Earth is in two important respects not at all unworldly: you can choose to focus on the surprises and pleasures, or the frustrations. And you can choose to appreciate the smallest scraps of experience, the everyday moments, or to value only the grandest, most stirring ones.”

I want to experience wonder every day and sometimes it will randomly happen but most of the time those “ah ha!” moments are a result of my discipline to clear the landscape of niggling irritations and fears so that I can appreciate the spectacular. I did some junk drawer cleaning today. Part of the task was writing this post and experiencing sparks of wonder in the process.

Your Purpose Is In Perpetual Beta

Screen Shot 2015-03-24 at 7.26.23 PMI just finished writing an essay about the number of rabbit trails I have found myself traveling down while seeking out a specific goal or dream. I entitled the piece, In The Meantime and the writing itself was a meandering discovery of amazing encounters I have experienced while wandering around the bulls eye of purpose. Here’s a segment.

Where would you like to be?

I scour my memory for my favourite places. I think of the time I watched the sun set over the ponds that crotchet the Longji rice terraces. On our first afternoon during the last embers of the sun I lingered on the perilous deck of a mountain chalet. I gazed across the alluring vista and I was mesmerized by the local women lumbering home under the yoke of their bulging rice sacks. As the sun retreated behind the mountains I smelled the aroma of Szechuan food frying in the impossibly small chalet kitchen. I was hungry despite the questionable meat being specially prepared just for our group. I tried not recall the villager I saw just earlier that morning skinning a scrawny rat with a pairing knife while we trudged by him on the narrow the path leading to this mountain village.  Screen Shot 2015-04-14 at 12.31.23 PM

I came here when I realized I was shrivelling with grief and boredom. I couldn’t figure out how to draft the next chapter of my life so in the meantime I traveled to this uncomfortable land. I almost lost my life to altitude sickness but the journey also showed me how to breathe again. I learned how to take a breath and let life unfold before me and endure the discomfort of waiting before attempting to shape and mold its edges and corners. This is where I have spent most of my life – in the meantime. While striving to achieve the dreams I precariously draft again and again I find myself straying to transitory trails and places. Are these ventures meant to distract me from the boredom of the not yet, or the despair of the never? I don’t know but in the meantime I’ll savour this sleeping beauty next to me, his fingers on my spine, his breath soothing me to sleep. Maybe, I’ll try to grasp just this moment just as it is right now – more life than I could ever imagine and more perfect than I could ever design.

This is a whisper of encouragement to those who also wonder if the circuitous experience you find yourself in is a misleading distraction or a constructive course of true purpose. Ask yourself, “What results do I want to create?” Don’t worry about how you will achieve your intentions/goals/dreams. Focus on what you wish to create and if you feel energized, excited and even a little unsure then that’s enough clarity to keep moving towards your target. Donald Miller says, Meaning is found in the movement. Even if you are not sure whether this experience is the right turn to achieve your vision, you will gain insights along the way and live the life you never dreamed possible.

Who is there when you’re halfway to the finish?

A few weeks back I ran the Victoria 1/2 Marathon. It was a majestic day in Victoria with unseasonably warm temperatures and a festive summer vibe throughout the streets. I had been training for this event for three years and finally the day arrived.  I had never run such an event before I had no idea what to expect. Aside from the delirious puking and fainting fears that lingered in the final moments before I fell asleep the night before the race I was fairly confident I could finish the course.

When preparing for such an event I sometimes thought about the finish line. What would I  feel at the end?
Who would I see at the finish?

Such images fill the spaces between each strike along the chosen path during  early morning training runs.

As it was no one was there to greet me at the finish line.

I sprinted to the end, crossed the line, passed the line of cookies and doughnuts desperately searched for more water and drove home.

In decades to come I won’t remember the finish line.

Here’s what I will remember.

My friend Jean.

..cheering me on at the 10km mark
with a smile
a laugh
and a front page illustration of Justin Trudeau
(I have a slight Justin infatuation- that’s another post)

My Reaction?

And here’s the gem.

It doesn’t matter who meets you at the end of an accomplishment.
Who meets you in the middle?
Who makes you laugh so deep you regain perspective?

Who doesn’t care if you ever accomplish anything? But is just there because

you

are.

Out of the stock exchange into the climbing gym

Living most of my life on the West Coast has caused me to view our public education system with defensive dismay. Upon entering the teaching profession in the late 80’s no one warned me that I would experience negative perceptions from all levels of society- friends, strangers, media, government representatives and even fellow colleagues.

My first exposure to jaundiced public perception was in my first year of teaching when I listened to MLA’s publicly berate teachers with derogatory comments  such as, “Get your buns back to work” (Randy White, MP, Abbotsford) inferring we were delinquent malcontents who enjoyed celebrating  the disruption of the school year.

I stopped engaging in and defending the “teacher horror story” conversations that would spontaneously erupt at parties and filled numerous newspaper headlines aching for attention especially at the beginning of a new school year. I became numb to the numerous reminders of  how “lucky” I was to have a job that offers so much time off and short working days.

Anyone who lives with a teacher knows a different reality.

Some days I felt lucky to be a teacher.

Some days it felt like a curse…

This rant explains the mindset I arrived with when I attended The Seventeenth National Congress in Rural Education in Saskatoon last week.

Within minutes of being at this conference I immediately sensed a different connection among all levels of those who worked in the education system. The formal introductions at the beginning of the Conference included the Mayor of Saskatchewan, a MLA, the Saskatchewan Teacher’s Association President, the Dean of Education at The University of Saskatchewan-ALL OF THEM were actively involved in this conference.

I soon discovered that the conference was attended by many school board trustees, parents, and reps from the Ministry of Education as well as teachers. I had never attended a conference like this before.

It felt like I had lived most of my professional life in an environment that resembled the stock exchange floor and someone just opened the door to the climbing gym where everyone seemed to express their role primarily as a support for one another.

While sitting there I tried to remember:

When was the last time I saw a MLA or an MP at a public school conference? Never.

When was the last time I attended a conference in which there just as many trustees, parents as there were teachers?

Never.

When was the last time I saw a sense of pride for the school system and those who work in it?
I wish I could remember.

Which makes me wonder… Why?

Why don’t I see MLA’s MP’s and representatives from all levels of education attending the same conference and meeting one another to discuss the topics that inspire and challenge them in British Columbia?

Maybe if this happened we wouldn’t find ourselves in acrimonious positions that result in loss for everyone.

Lessons From The Cowboy Trail

Vodpod videos no longer available.

To really get the vibe of this post, listen to Corb Lund singing,  Alberta Says Hello by clicking on the play button below

I had the privilege of spending time with a friend who I have known for a long time. And every time we get together I experience what I call the intersection of all things good coming together- comfort, perspective, challenge and just knowing that the person you are sitting with knows you. We live in different provinces and sometimes months go by without hearing from one another but when we do connect, no excuses, no pretension, we just chill out and let each other in. It’s at these times when I feel the most blessed and humbled. Blessed because despite my personal baggage perceived or otherwise I know I have a friend who gets it and gets me. Humbled because I feel like I’ve won the lottery  in lifegood health, choices, freedom and a friend.

So if you haven’t chilled out with a friend for awhile I encourage you to call someone up right now, do it! Don’t listen to the negative reel, contact someone on a whim- the one who “fills your cup”  and gets you.